The Exposed Heart

            The  Exposed Heart

I asked the Lord to tell me about the heart.  The heart of man, the good, the bad and the ugly.  He didn’t tell me.   He showed me.  MY heart.  Not exactly what I was asking for.    Please know this was NOT a time of warm fuzzy feelings and desiring a group hug.   You can bet that from this moment on, I will be VERY careful for the things I ask the Lord to tell me!

In this same moment I invited the Lord to go to those deep crevices of my heart and examine them.  Places that even I am not yet aware of.  I pictured this like one of those deep cave expeditions, you know the guys wearing kaki shorts, back packs on, with the flashlight strapped to their foreheads.  Each turn and twist unknown or never seen before until the light shines on it, examining closely, each rock formation, every nook and cranny.

David sought this too, of his own heart,  Psalm 26:2  (see also Ps. 139:23-24)

Test me, O Lord and try me
examine my heart and my mind.

I am amazed at the depth and extent that David was asking of God.  ‘Test me, examine  me’, these are courtroom terms, meaning to investigate closely, see what evidence there is to be found and yet  while you are there … refine and purify.

David wants God to look at his heart, emotions and will, his intellect, understanding – even the wisdom he walks in.  BUT he does not stop there…  he says  examine too …  my mind.  The word he uses for mind is the Hebrew word that can actually be translated as ‘kidneys’ (reins).  This is the figurative word picture of ‘the inner most and most private aspect of a person’*   I can sense the deep groaning of David as he cries out, “O God go deep, here in my heart, but don’t stop there… go deeper, don’t stop until You have seen and dealt with all of me”.

David expresses too in Psalm 19:14

May the words of my mouth and the
meditation of my heart be pleasing in
Your sight, O LORD, my Rock and my
Redeemer.

It is not only our words that God desires pleasure from, but the ‘goings on’ (if you will) of our heart.  Those things, events or people we set our mind on, our internal thoughts, those things we wrap our emotions around.

Meditation can also mean the ‘whispering or murmuring’ of our heart.  What are we whispering about?  Are there longings there that should NOT be, yet we feel safe because we have not actually verbalized them?   I found this question in the New Living Life Application Commentary, and it so took me back – it evoked tremendous thought and pondering on my part, not to mention GREAT self evaluation.

How would we change the way we live if we knew that every word – every thought was FIRST examined by God?

Ps. 139:4 

Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely
O LORD.
               

Phew!  As we wipe the sweat from our brow… THAT is intense.  I believe many of us would say as Isaiah did (Is. 6:5) “Woe is me!  For I am undone, because I am a man of unclean lips …”.    I would say … “I am a woman that fails to provide You O Lord,  with pure and selfless thoughts, my heart wrapped where it should not be… WOE is me!”

Jesus says in Matthew 5:8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God”.  As I study this verse, this is how I understand it. Exceedingly glad is the man that keeps his mind, will and emotions clean and continues on in the cleaning process, for he will ‘see’ (horao) God.  This ‘seeing’ is the equivalent to the Hebrew version of ‘experience’.   Experiencing God in such a way that he will actually perceive Him and get Him.   The opposite of this?   If we do not pursue the purity of God in our lives, ALL of our lives, He will hide Himself from us,  He and His God’s things will be kept a secret to us.

The heart exposed.  May we allow Him to be the Expeditionor, who straps on His light of love and goes deep!

Have  a God-loving deep groaning for His searching and dealing ~ week.

In Him, DeDe (Ps. 92:4 You thrill me, LORD …)

Complete Word Study Dictionary of the Old Testament

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