I Aint Goin Nowhere!

Have you ever asked a question of God, then realize months later He is answering it? I JUST realized, (wiping my brow) the process I am in, in my Christian walk. Here lies such an answering. Months ago, perhaps nearly a year, in my study of Peter, I asked the Lord, “Show me what a bondservant is.” May I express with a humorous twist, “What on earth was I THINKING!”Taking a breath, and continuing to whine, “Am I NUTS, when I ask God to show me something, I should know by now, that means dragging me through the transformation of learning FIRST  HAND, which usually results in me kicking and screaming the whole way!” Might I add, with a bit of mourning and gnashing of teeth. Sigh.
I, Simon Peter, am a servant and apostle of Jesus Christ… Grace and peace to you many times over as you deepen in your experience with God and Jesus, our Master.” (2 Peter 2:1-2)
HERE, is where my journey began. I so love Peters attitude, he was honest, didn’t hold much back, he was first out of the boat, the one who ran, and at times spoke before he thought it through, or acted before he gave much thought (um, enough said).Taking a closer look at Peter, I got as far as, “I, Simon Peter, am a servant…”In my geeky time with this portion of the verse, I was dumbfounded, and perhaps that is why it has taken me a year to process. The word ‘servant’ here is HUGE, literally meaning, ‘bondservant’. I have pages and pages of hand written notes, as I explored the topic. From web surfing, to bible page turning, to cross referencing in my Bible software.

Bondservant, doulos. Paul literally declared it, James said it too, it was even said of Moses, and yes, said of Jesus Himself. A bondservant is one who gives him/herself up in devotion to another, disregarding their own interest or gain. It is completely and utterly becoming selfless, and surrendering. The key here is… voluntarily  yielding to anothers authority.

I’d like to take us back, waaay back to the book of Exodus, to help paint a picture. Chapter 21, it speaks of the boundaries of Hebrew slavery. In short, if a Hebrew slave serves for 6 years, on the 7th year they shall go free. Verses, 5-6 “But if the servant declares ‘I love my master…’ then his master shall take him to the door or the doorpost and pierce his ear with an awl. Then he will be his servant for life(emphasis mine).Recently I found myself in spontaneous B.S. Please don’t gasp, that is spontaneous Bible study you silly. A dear friend asked questions about Ruth of the Old Testament. As we took a deeper look, we found Ruth is the epitome of devotion. She served Naomi and once Ruth took on Naomi’s people, her destiny was being fulfilled, she became the great/grand mother to King David. We NEVER know ‘where’ our devotion and passion will take us. Servanthood, investing ourselves in another.
Jesus gives a wonderful parable of servanthood in Matthew 25. It speaks of the master handing out small portions of money, and watching how each servant uses it. Did they invest it, or act on their own weaknesses. One was afraid, and buried it. Another invested it, which gave the master a great profit. The masters response, “Well done, good and faithful servant!” A faithful servant seeks and finds delight in His masters success. I once heard the description of a faithful servant as one who does not rob God of His glory. Doesn’t THAT make us shudder in our shoes. Am I robbing God of His glory when I act on my own? When I pause in obedience, when I offer a deaf ear and head in another direction? Ouch!
Bondservant, it is not being perfect, yet it is a dedication to follow my God.I did find some consolation in my qwest of being a God servant. Knowing that I fall short OFTEN. Paul, the bondservant of Jesus Christ says, “But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the benefit you reap leads to holiness, and the result is eternal life.” (Ro. 6:22) The word Paul uses here for ‘become slaves’ is a form of doulos, it means BEING  MADE a servant. It is a process. It denotes not so much service, as it does dependence. Many think to be in subjection to God, we are in a form of bondage, it is not a handcuffed scenario. The chains are broken.  It is seeking to walk in a closeness to my God. I am learning to depend on Him.

I tend to be an odd bird, and colorfully admit it. In response to my study of what it is to be a bondservant, I needed to make a decision. I decided AGAIN, that I adore my God, I want to seek His interest and find delight in doing so. I want my dependence to be on Him and Him alone. I want the benefits that lead to holiness. I want as Ruth, my devotion and passion to lead me to my destiny.
You may think I am crazy, but I went and got my right ear lobe pierced last weekend. As a symbol to myself, that when I look in the mirror, I am reminded, of who and Who’s I am. That I can at any time as a free woman walk away from my Master. But I love Him too much and want to stay. I aint goin nowhere! I volunteer to yield to His authority. I am thankful of His graciousness, and accept this is a process. If someone asks me about the dinky diamond stud in my right ear?  I will tell them, I will tell them, I am a servant of the Most High God, a daughter of the King.
It is no longer I who lives, but Christ lives in me…” (Gal. 2:20) Will I get it right every time? Nope. But God knows my heart.  So, like Peter I say, “I DeDe, am a servant of Jesus Christ…”


 You may not need to take such drastic measures as peircing your ear, but is there a decision you need to make in your relationship with God?  Do you again need to lower your head, close your eyes and declare I NEED You Jesus, I want to serve You and I again render my will to Yours.  Remember, it is a process.  Cut yourself some slack, relax … then again, just allow your God to break the chain and be FREE!  Free to be His!
In Him, DeDe (“Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love & good deeds” ~ Heb. 10:24)

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